Nov 2018
For Ntozake
With my penchant for lateness (just as belatedly I write this) I arrived very late to the table of Ntozake Shange, some time in the early 2000s when I serendipitously stumbled across 'For colored girls who have considered suicide/ when the rainbow is enuf' on the shelves of a book swap cafe.
With the delicious luxury of time on my hands, I hungrily devoured the contents of its pages not once, but twice in a week.
This enchanting book appeared to me an exquisitely crafted collection of recipes. Each and every word carefully selected, measured, ground and melded into nutritious and delicious verses that fed the famished and malnourished hunger of my soul.
Recipes handed down through generations of women of colour, fortified and nuanced with varied experience.
Succulent odes to sapid and bitter love of the lover and self.
Raw, tender, pulpy vulnerability. Oppression, rape, abortion and depression, all laid bare on the board, chopped up and blended with tears of candour, then flavoured with piquant honesty and slap downs.
A heavy yet sophisticated menu. All finished off with a cinnamon sweet and spicy course of ripe, mouthwatering self-acceptance.
With the delicious luxury of time on my hands, I hungrily devoured the contents of its pages not once, but twice in a week.
This enchanting book appeared to me an exquisitely crafted collection of recipes. Each and every word carefully selected, measured, ground and melded into nutritious and delicious verses that fed the famished and malnourished hunger of my soul.
Recipes handed down through generations of women of colour, fortified and nuanced with varied experience.
Succulent odes to sapid and bitter love of the lover and self.
Raw, tender, pulpy vulnerability. Oppression, rape, abortion and depression, all laid bare on the board, chopped up and blended with tears of candour, then flavoured with piquant honesty and slap downs.
A heavy yet sophisticated menu. All finished off with a cinnamon sweet and spicy course of ripe, mouthwatering self-acceptance.
I was spellbound and stilled by this kaleidoscopic challenge to the cultural aesthetic I had grown into, and revitalised by the courage and pride in her words. It helped to set me on a tentative path to confidence in my voice and the conviction of my own experiences. A path that through creative exploration I continue to walk.
Shange wrote words that were there for me when I needed them, and as she once said herself: “I write for young girls of color, for girls who don’t even exist yet, so that there is something there for them when they arrive". So, with the luxury of time on my hands once more and an entire Saturday to myself, I re-read this wonderful book today with all the appreciation of the first read.
RIP Ntozake. Thank you for your words and thank you for the rainbow.